00:00You may have ignored this news. As this is not a new thing.
00:06Every year, thousands of children die due to exam pressure.
00:12So, when on 29th January, 18-year-old JEE aspirant Niharika died in Kota, Rajasthan, it was not a breaking news.
00:20But it was a heart-breaking news for Niharika and for the millions of youth of the country.
00:29Let me explain. Kota, the coaching capital of our country.
00:33 Hundreds of children come here every year with the dream of cracking medical and engineering exams.
00:38Some of them achieve their dreams, and some of them break them.
00:42And last year, around 30 children ended their lives in Kota.
00:48Niharika has become the second suicide case in Kota this year. And she didn't even fail.
00:55Her JEE exam was two days away. But maybe she couldn't handle the pressure and she gave up.
01:01 In her suicide note, Niharika wrote Mummy and Papa, I can't do JEE so I am committing suicide.
01:09I am a loser. I am the worst daughter. Sorry Mummy, Papa. This is the last option.
01:14 This note impacted me a lot. Because I had this negative thought at one point in my life.
01:24 I failed in my class 11 exams. It is sad to fail in entrance exams, love exams, job exams. It hurts, I know.
01:34But when you fail in your school, where your elder brother is a school topper,
01:38where you are a prefect and a national level debater,
01:41where you come from a family where every uncle is either from IIT or IIM,
01:47 failing in front of old friends you are studying with
01:52It was a pro max feeling of shame
01:56I understood what is humiliation for the first time in my life.
02:00 I had bad thoughts, but I was lucky. I had at least one teacher with whom I could openly talk.
02:07 His name was Kalaal McFarland, who later became the principal of my school, La Martinière Boys College
02:13I got courage from him, and removed the bad thought from my mind.
02:20I also wrote a note to my parents and asked for a chance with an apology
02:27that I have made a mistake - I am not able to do the class 11 maths and commerce let me switch to plan B
02:36 let me take arts, history, economics, English the subjects I am interested in... commerce was chosen under peer pressure
02:46 I promised them that in a few months I will come first in half yearly exams in a few months.
02:52I don't know how this 11th grade boy got so much confidence that he is talking about coming first.
03:00But my parents didn't laugh at me. They didn't beat me.
03:05 At that time, they did the most amazing work. Nothing.
03:10They did not say much, did not scold me, did not interfere in my life. They did not stop me from taking arts. They trusted me in that difficult time
03:21And they supported me with silence in that delicate time.
03:26Then I started from zero. I even used cursive handwriting books from nursery class to improve my handwriting.
03:41 I worked with focus and never came second in school in 11th, 12th, final, etc.
03:47I topped in Humanities in my school that year
03:50 After years, my mother gave me that note back. Today, I keep this note very carefully.
03:55To remind me that next time when life kicks me, I should not give up.
04:00So, should I call Vidhu Vinod Chopra to make this 11th Fail movie?
04:06You must be thinking, wow, what a happy ending! I worked hard and got the result. This is a motivational story. I can become Akash Maheshwari.
04:16But the problem is that I have a bad habit of speaking bitterly.
04:20And the students and the parents who are watching this episode by mistake, they will have to hear this bitter truth
04:27Because there is no happy ending in real life. Kids are told pass this or that exam, else will be fine - it is not like that. Success and failure are both parts of real life
04:41Even after cracking competitive exams, most people don't feel happy ending.
04:47A new set of struggles starts after that. It is an achievement, no doubt. I am not denying it
04:52But ask an average IITian who is not in AIR 1, 2 or Computer Science.
04:58After studying in the world-famous IIT, after graduating, does the struggle in life end? In job, love, health?
05:06Yes, when we make episodes about this, we get a lot of abuses. But IITian says Akash you made the right video - life is not all hunky dory
05:16Let's come back to my failures. Because it's not like everything went well after 11th failed
05:23After 12th, I thought of National Law School. It had just started. I wanted to go to Bangalore
05:30 I prepared well for the entrance. I was a school topper. I thought I will do good in the court
05:39 I didn't even get a call for the interview.
05:42Again, plan B Let's go to Delhi University Like thousands of kids go to Delhi University from Lucknow, UP, Bihar
05:51Thankfully, good numbers got me admission in Hindu College
05:54 I debated for 3 years in Delhi University
05:58The aim was to become the country's number one TV anchor.
06:03If you look at history, there is no debate in 3 years I did not win
06:10There should be a plan A, no other plan. Super confident that Jamia MCRC is made for me. Jamia or nothing else
06:24I didn't get an interview call from Jamia. I didn't even have a plan B
06:29I was also told to stop media and prepare for UPSC. You have that mettle
06:36But in those 3 years at DU, I had seen the bitter truth of UPSC.
06:42Lakhs of students from all over the country come to Delhi. They live in colonies like Mukherjee Nagar. They study coaching there. They work hard.
06:54I saw 12th fail. I cried a lot. Not because I wanted to give UPSC.
07:00 But because I have seen the race and the pressure. My friends have lived that experience
07:09That's why I don't agree with this movie. That's why we didn't review this movie on Deshbhakt. Many people asked us, as it is considered one of the best movies of 2023
07:23Because the real life is like Joram. You may not have seen it but happy ending does not happen
07:30Manoj Bajpai, former Naxal, throughout the movie he keeps on running
07:3512th fail has a problem although it is a brilliant movie
07:41Superlative acting, superlative direction. But this movie is a false hope.
07:49Just like TVF's aspirants. Happy ending is important. Who wants to see depression?
07:58It is said that if you work hard, UPSC will be cleared, depending on your hard work
08:07So, victory is for Abhilash and Manoj. Sandeep and Gauri Shankar are cute supporting actors.
08:15But who will tell you the bitter truth? 99.8% UPSC aspirants are Gauri Shankar bhaiya and not Manoj.
08:24Because they have not thought about plan B. Like those lakhs of kids who try to get into IIT-JEE, same story there.
08:32The story of top engineering medical colleges is also something like this. The question is, have you or your parents kept any option of plan B open or not?
08:42Because until you don't keep plan B, plan C, plan D, that last option will come to mind, that dirty option.
08:50Thankfully I had a plan B.
08:54I had 58% in my 3 years of history. So I hopped over from Hindu college to St. Stephen's College.
09:02I got a residence from Hindu college to Stephen's college - I too have a Nitish inside of me
09:08I cracked the Radio Mirchi auditions in the next month.
09:15When FM was launched in Delhi in 2003, I had a late night show.
09:23Then I applied to Columbia and Boston Universities for MS in Broadcast Journalism.
09:32I thought I should have a Columbia degree.
09:37Columbia rejected me. Boston said, pay Rs 40 lakhs. Papa didn't have Rs 40 lakhs.
09:44So, that dream also got shattered. Then, option B. There was no option B.
09:50I started working in media without formal training or degree, with Headlines Today
09:59 I started from zero. I even lost the fame I had earned in radio.
10:06I had to ingest the tape in the computer system. I had to make a log of the tape. I started from there.
10:13Then I became a reporter, producer, anchor, special correspondent.
10:17Maoist attack in Dantewada, 26-11 terror attack, Chandrayaan-1. I have covered many stories.
10:24How our country was made, who made it, etc.
10:27Many people ask why I am so negative. Because I have seen politicians for so many years.
10:31Then I did a 9pm show. What is the ultimate aim of people? That we will become senior journalists, we will do a 9pm show, we will debate.
10:40But I realized it was not for me
10:43The work that I had been wanting to do for years, that was the aim of my childhood.
10:49After doing that, I understood that it was not what I wanted
10:53Plan B was not there ... So, went back to the management side of radio
11:01 Then, started satire, social and political commentary, and inspiration from late-night American shows.
11:11Today, after 5 years, we are not a big shot. But I have a solid family of 60 lakh across social media platforms
11:24 I drive a 12-year-old car. I am happier than my schoolmates
11:29I am not frustrated. I am independent. I have a team. I enjoy working. But why am I saying all this?
11:44This is not the point of this channel and we are not an inspirational channel.
11:48 I have made this video to explain two points. First point, learn to keep a plan B.
11:55Because this life is very bad. It ruins your plan A.
12:02My example - law did not happen, Jamia did not, Columbia did not happen ... Plan A never worked
12:10Honestly, is making satirical videos on YouTube the purpose of life? Maybe not
12:20Other aspirations can be born ... it is okay. Director, writer, many options - even if I don't succeed I won't give up
12:32In fact, i f this channel is shut down, what will be the next best thing I will do?
12:38Keep 100% focus on plan A. But somewhere in the back of the mind, somewhere in the mind, keep plan B.
12:45Point number 2. Whose fault is this? Now, this is a complicated question. Many answers...
12:50Why is it complicated? Because we can blame a lot of things.
12:55We can say that competition has increased, reservation has increased, technology has increased, war is going on in Ukraine. We can give a lot of excuses.
13:03Or we can work on the factors that we can control. And the biggest factor that we can control is family relations.
13:11What upbringing are parents giving their children? And what options are you giving to children?
13:17Or do they think, no, all or nothing, option A or else it's over?
13:23 If you are a parent who thinks option A or nothing, then you are a failure as a parent.
13:30I am not saying that spoil the children, treat them with kid gloves, become a helicopter parent. No
13:36Tell the children what is social reality, what is competitiveness. But you should understand their interests and let them choose accordingly.
13:45Or are kids born to fulfill your wishes?
13:48In my time, my parents supported me. They gave me space which seems like students like Niharika didn't get
13:57 She didn't get that space. In my time, I got a mentor, a teacher with whom I could talk and get support.
14:04Niharika didn't have that mentor.
14:07I had second option to do something. Niharika didn't have that, and then final option - take your life
14:17Society is not going to change easily. Parents will have to change.
14:23We will have to separate our honor and pride from our children.
14:28If you want to join so much, then join your Aadhar card, PAN card, bank account.
14:33But why are you trying to mix your children's status with your identity?
14:41Their struggles and failures are different from yours.
14:45 Your worry is justified. I am not saying that you care. I know you care
14:50 But what is the point of such a concern that can take someone's life or ruin it?
14:55Even today, there are millions of children who are pursuing their parents' dream college and dream course, not their own. It must stop
15:05Thinking needs to evolve ... there are plethora of careers available
15:14Finally, if you are still not getting it, then a few points are very simple.
15:18 On every turn, every step, there should be a plan B.
15:22 All in or all or nothing should not be the case... focus on plan A but leave scope for plan B
15:31Do you know this person? Aspirants please answer....
15:36Venky Ramakrishnan, who could not crack IIT exam
15:45Christian Medical College rejected him
15:48 Later, he studied BSc in Physics at MS University Baroda.
15:53He also won a Nobel Prize with hard work and dedication.
15:56What is the point of all India Rank 1,2,3 holders in UPSC?
16:04From 2000 to 2005, what have top three done for the country in the last 10 years?
16:19 What is UPSC measuring? Person's intelligence? What will he do? Because one cannot see.
16:26Whatever effort you put, when chance is 0.2%, 0.1001%, your effort does not matter. There are so many variable factors in this.
16:36Don't listen to me, listen to Prime Minister as Modi ji himself has said....
16:41parents should stop using their children's report card as their visiting card.
16:46What is Sharma Ji's son doing? Let Sharma Ji worry. You just be concerned with your son
16:51But it's not like the government is doing anything special. It's okay to speak, but what is happening on ground?
16:58Look at Kota.... Spring is being installed on the ceiling fans so that suicide cannot happen.
17:05Indian Institute of Science. The most prestigious institution in the country as far as science is concerned. Founded by Tatas in 1909
17:14 Who was their first director? C.V. Raman. What is this institution doing?
17:18It is putting a spring in the hostel rooms. If we deal with this serious problem at this level that we will put a spring
17:25and not try to find the root cause, then the country will remain a joke
17:29NCRB data is also showing how we are making a joke of this situation.
17:3313,000 students died by suicide in 2021.
17:36 This is a 30% increase from 2017.
17:41This means that 36 students were committing suicide every day in 2021.
17:49So we need to change our thinking. And we need to look at the failure point. Is failure that bad?
17:59 After failing so many times in life, we have understood that failure is a good thing. It keeps your ego in check.
18:05Whenever I get overconfident, I check my report card. I check that I was overconfident and I failed. I keep a rejection letter of Columbia University.
18:22Okay, if someone came to you and said you are a failure, I would have slapped him.
18:30But later, these things remind you, these things inspire you, these things show you a different perspective of life.
18:40Life is unfair. Understand it. Now tell me what you will do after this... companies ask this question. How you overcame it?
18:51So, these things need to be changed otherwise, these tragic news will become frequent
18:58The government has done a very good job - you cannot do coaching for students less than 16 years old - they had made it a business
19:07On the other hand, the social game will also have to change. Mummy papa will have to play the biggest role.
19:12You will have to learn, unfortunately, how to manage your children in this increasingly competitive world,
19:17 where social pressure is on your kid's life, don't put more crushing pressure on it. This is my request.
19:24And this is the only reason to share your failures. At least learn from my failures
19:30one failure, two failures, three failures, it's okay. If parents don't support you, who will?
19:35Failure or success. Wishing you all the best.
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