00:05billy we've met before rj we have never
00:09it is a great pleasure to meet you
00:11it is a great pleasure to meet you too
00:14all right first let me begin by saying
00:16i thoroughly enjoyed this movie
00:21with my family at home
00:24with the crazy white blanket and the
00:26star maker thing that was
00:28in the house it was an experience and i
00:32have to say there aren't too many films
00:35that our family has really sat around
00:38together and watched every nightmare
00:40before christmas kind of the exorcist
00:42maybe but your movie
00:46amazing and i remember after watching it
00:50i told everybody that i knew that they
00:52should watch this too for a number of
00:53reasons but my first question is how did
01:00we met in uh in in billy's backyard at
01:05that's featured so prominently in the
01:08uh and um uh billy was there phineas
01:14um a couple of uh other good people and
01:20conversation was what what might we do
01:22together what my what what film might
01:28of course uh immediately excited uh
01:31meeting everybody and and being in the
01:35and imagining that there was a film to
01:38be told not only about
01:40what billy and phineas were
01:42uh were in the process of creating but
01:45also going to be bringing to the world
01:46over the year to come but also about
01:50billy what billy was going to be going
01:52through as a person in the year to come
01:57as an artist and as a young woman and
02:02and i told billy in that conversation
02:06that i identify as a teenage girl and uh
02:09she uh she just seemed to accept me for
02:12that and uh and she told me that she uh
02:16that she hoped that maybe the film would
02:17be like the office and i uh accepted her
02:20for that and and off we went
02:23i mean hi billy how did you feel were
02:25you were you nervous about the whole
02:26thing i was just skeptical i mean i just
02:29didn't i didn't think about it
02:30realistically i just thought uh
02:35what do you mean a documentary you know
02:36it's like not a thing that
02:4316 year old it's just not it doesn't
02:44make sense and why would you want to do
02:47especially when you know my career was
02:50nothing really at the time and
02:52it was big for me but it wasn't anything
02:54to write about and i just didn't
02:57understand why anyone would care so that
03:01was really just how i felt so i was like
03:02i don't care [ __ ] it sure whatever it's
03:04not gonna matter but
03:06then it started to matter and that was
03:09really crazy and then i started to think
03:13back and forth way of like thinking back
03:16to how how crazy it is that that they
03:20wanted to make a documentary about my
03:21life and then my life became something
03:23maybe worth making a documentary about
03:25and they did that before it even was
03:27which is really kind of nuts to me so
03:30yeah it all was just very
03:34i just didn't care at first i started to
03:38well one of the things i thought was
03:41about it was that it seems like from all
03:44of the footage you had from when you
03:46were young that there was an entire
03:50body of a documentary even before you
03:53met rj and so you know
03:56so for whatever reason you and your
03:59family were documenting all of these
04:01things long before the idea of a
04:03documentary so then you had this
04:05advantage of having all of this
04:07backstory and all these visuals and all
04:09this footage to sort of rely on for some
04:13for the rest of the film and it
04:15normalized everything i mean just at
04:17those peaks where things were so bananas
04:19where it's like oh my god you know you'd
04:21see this footage of you
04:23as a kid like in your backyard and rj
04:25i'm sure like oh my god what a gold mine
04:28man like how amazing was that how how
04:31great was that to sort of like balance
04:33these you know these two these two lives
04:37well we you know look we live in an
04:39amazing moment where where people's
04:42lives can be documented throughout their
04:46and and in billy's case there was all
04:48there was indeed all of this footage uh
04:51all this amazing footage of her as a as
04:53a little girl but also um we had a our
04:57secret weapon which was uh maggie
05:01and and her iphone that were
05:05that were there all the time so even
05:07when we weren't there for key moments
05:10uh there was there was
05:13there was maggie shooting and
05:15and there ended up being about uh
05:17maybe two three hundred hours
05:20of footage that was family created that
05:25that everybody the most important thing
05:27was that was that maggie and billy and
05:29everybody trusted us
05:31with that footage and trust us to see it
05:34that was such a gift that was the
05:36greatest gift of all they would give us
05:38hard drives and then we would look
05:40through it and see in these incredible
05:42things really key moments well that was
05:45my next question was i mean the
05:48between you and the family like billy
05:54to trust this guy like how do you decide
05:57like oh okay i'm just gonna let you
05:58follow me around for a year here's all
05:59my family pictures from when i was a kid
06:01and blah blah blah like yeah go for it
06:05does he earn that are you so open that
06:07you just give it to him does it evolve
06:09over time like how does that work
06:17the meeting in the yard um and it really
06:20just was that i liked him and i felt
06:24actually believed in whatever this was
06:28and you know if if yeah i am a really
06:34pretty open in front of cameras like to
06:39i i i'm not just randomly to anybody it
06:42has to be somebody that i feel
06:44is genuine and gives me a feeling of
06:46trust and with rj he just he just made
06:49me feel like seen and heard and i felt
06:52he cared and it wasn't just kind of a
06:56you're a young star and you're gonna you
06:59know it was very much like this is
07:01really interesting and i think that
07:03there's something here and what i really
07:05did like and appreciated was
07:09i wasn't my my life and career wasn't
07:18though it wasn't that crazy he he still
07:20wanted to make something and i was like
07:22that that's very interesting to me and
07:24like makes me feel good that it's not
07:26when you get big and when you get all
07:28this attention that people want to start
07:30because usually that's how it is people
07:31want to start making things for you when
07:33you're already big and when you're
07:35already you know whatever and what was
07:37really sweet to me was that he cared
07:40like before anybody did and that was
07:43that meant a lot to me and i saw that
07:47you know this this person seems like
07:50want to know what's going on and want to
07:53uh capture it and i'm gonna let that
07:56happen well it's funny r.j i i feel like
08:08and you're you're both um
08:11sort of attuned to that sort of
08:19see billy i'm sure that rj was like me
08:22and that long before there was that
08:24crazy explosion of your career
08:29there there was this uh
08:32um there was this obvious
08:34emotional value to what you were doing
08:38and so i'm sure that like even had your
08:40career never exploded
08:42that the movie still would have been
08:45filled with that thing that people love
08:48about your music but so here's a
08:50question so both of you as as creative
08:59i like to i like to sort of i like to
09:01find the parallels between the
09:04and the arc of a story in a documentary
09:07and that of a song because billy is a
09:11you get from point a to point b and
09:13there's a reason why there's a beginning
09:14and an end and same with you rj so
09:23and the composition of that story
09:26relative to the composition of the song
09:29uh well it's it's such a great question
09:32it what it puts me in the mind of all of
09:35the things that we're talking about put
09:36me in the mind of the fact that i i in
09:40i have always thought of billy as a as a
09:45she she writes she writes her work is
09:47about her life her experience her
09:49emotional life her empathy her
09:55one of course as you're describing
09:58has felt that throughout her career and
10:00uh and throughout the our our exposure
10:03to her music um and as a filmmaker you
10:06see in the film you see that incredible
10:09scene where she's kind of describing
10:11what she wants uh uh what she wants the
10:18when the party's over that that that is
10:20gonna that is going to be shot and you
10:23see the instincts you see the filmmaking
10:24instincts that are amazing so so i'm i'm
10:29collaborating with uh not just a fellow
10:31artist in a different medium and genre
10:34but i'm collaborating with a with
10:35someone who instinctually kind of has a
10:38sense of what we're doing and what we're
10:42the the structure of the experience
10:45they're really two parts to it the first
10:47part is when we're filming and when
10:49we're filming we're really just seeing
10:53we're not we're not i don't want
10:55anything i just want to see what's
10:56happening in billy's life
10:59and what her experiences and
11:03week-to-week month-to-month you know
11:06we're we're we're just trying to see it
11:08all as clearly as possible it's me and
11:11and jenna rocher who's holding the
11:12camera and jake kim is taking sound and
11:16and we're just trying to see it all
11:20and you know we always say directing a
11:22documentary is what happens uh in the
11:25bar at the end of the day when you're
11:26just talking about what did you see
11:28today and what might you see tomorrow
11:30and then in the edit we're
11:33we're constructing a narrative and
11:37you know that's about
11:39putting the pieces together and finding
11:42out where the story is and where the
11:43resonances are and where pepper the dog
11:48and who's a who's a character in the
11:50narrative and discovering that
11:53and discovering how you know how billy
11:56is growing over time and seeing it with
11:58with the editors with that kind of
12:00clarity so i don't know anything about
12:02writing a song billy has to stick to
12:07that those are the kind of tasks at hand
12:14uh uh in the field you're just seeing
12:19you're you're you're again you're trying
12:21to see it all fresh and as clearly as
12:23possible from from moment one
12:26and billy you never sat down to do an
12:31never no was this a conscious decision
12:37yeah it was uh i mean rj can speak to
12:39this of like it wasn't it wasn't a
12:43movie it wasn't it wasn't a movie about
12:46people talking about me it was a movie
12:48about me and my life and really just my
12:50life and the lives around my life and
12:56i never like you know i was really
13:0015 when the conversation started i think
13:03and then you know 16 when it was
13:08happening and whatever and it's like you
13:11know my brain was all undeveloped and
13:14annoying and had a really annoying
13:16personality and really annoying
13:18tactics and a really annoying voice
13:21and i just i had a lot going on in my
13:23little 16 year old brain as anyone does
13:26and being a teenager is the worst
13:31i was just ha i had so much other stuff
13:35on my mind and also when you're a
13:36teenager there's so many things that
13:38don't matter to you that that
13:40matter to everyone else because life is
13:42so weird when you're that age i don't
13:44know how to explain it but
13:47honestly didn't give anything a thought
13:49that wasn't you know how i looked and
13:52how i came off and who looked cool when
13:53they were next to me and like stupid
13:55[ __ ] like that it made me i hate
13:56thinking about it but
13:58honestly i didn't even think about the
14:01documentary until like when halfway
14:02through filming it and then i was like
14:05this is actually happening my life is
14:10what the [ __ ] like i really just like
14:13started realizing it when i kind of
14:15became more self-aware as a human
14:20that was when i was like
14:22i kind of was like oh
14:23aren't we going to do like interviews or
14:25you know isn't there going to be like a
14:26sit-down interview and then it was like
14:28nope it's just about your life and i
14:30couldn't really believe that because
14:32i don't think i've ever seen a
14:33documentary or some sort of docu
14:37sit-down interviews i really i don't
14:39think i've ever seen that and i i didn't
14:41really understand how they were gonna
14:42tell a story without that and
14:45i was so excited to see
14:47and then when i did i just i literally i
14:49mean i was like blown away by the edit
14:51of how it came together because i was
14:53like how the [ __ ] like there was just so
14:57my stupid life filmed and it made a
15:00really good story it's crazy
15:03remember ages ago the foo fighters did a
15:05documentary our first documentary where
15:09it's kind of the opposite of you you did
15:11a documentary like kind of right is
15:13everything exploded we did one like
15:1515 years after being a band and the
15:17decision was basically like you know
15:19what we better do one now before it's
15:21like four hours long like it's just time
15:23let's just get it away this is like 10
15:26we made the documentary it was very cool
15:29and it was a lot of sit-down interviews
15:30and stuff explaining the last 15 years
15:32and then when the director
15:37he called and he said okay i have a cut
15:40i want you to look at
15:42um i think maybe you should come in
15:45first before the entire band comes in to
15:48watch it for fear that he would just
15:50totally break up the band with like this
15:53this movie where we're all sharing
15:54things that we've never said to each
15:57did you have any of those moments where
15:59you're like oh god they're going to hear
16:00me say this oh god i said this but like
16:02in watching it back i mean it's your
16:05truth right so then all of a sudden your
16:07truth is right here and you're like oh
16:08god what do i do with this did you have
16:10any of those moments dave i
16:14get what you just said uh
16:16yeah well this is the thing
16:20any ounce of the film until i got to see
16:24a cut which was october 9th of 2020
16:30it you know we had finished filming in
16:33january right and we had been filming
16:38you know and i again
16:41very open in front of cameras
16:45the ages they were filming
16:50i mean what kind of what's more
16:52terrifying than knowing that there's
16:55hundreds of thousands of hours
17:03from ages 15 to 7 i mean 18. i i mean
17:09so anxious leading up to watching it and
17:13when we were gonna watch it you know my
17:15family was like oh we all want to see it
17:17at the same time we all want to go and i
17:18was like i didn't allow anybody
17:21to see it before me i said i'm going to
17:23watch it you are not allowed to watch it
17:28laura who's my day to day and also my
17:30best friend and i had chelsea and
17:33who are like my on my creative team who
17:35are also my two best friends my only
17:37friends are people that i work with um
17:42went to my house and we
17:43we we got dropped off a hard drive i
17:46think with the movie on it
17:48and we we turned it on and it was like
17:50three hours long and we were terrified
17:54and we paused it we had to pause it like
17:5830 times throughout the movie just to
18:01like decompress and just like take a
18:03breath and be like what the [ __ ] are we
18:04going to do that's in the movie what am
18:06i going to do what am i how am i going
18:11yeah because there's a lot of stuff of
18:12me talking about people that i didn't
18:15you know that i didn't necessarily want
18:16them to know about or hear that i said
18:19that or how i felt and it's just i just
18:22really had to like step back and look at
18:25like a a third a third third perspective
18:29of like you know what i'm not gonna look
18:30at this personally and oh my god how is
18:33that person gonna feel i'm gonna look at
18:34it from a movie standpoint and what's
18:41the most impactful and the best
18:43uh for the story and that's that's
18:45really what i did i just had to just
18:46put away my my ego and just do it
18:50absolutely well that's i mean there were
18:52some there were some moments
19:01and hard to watch i mean
19:12not in the same situation but in some
19:14similar situations where you really feel
19:20being driven to a point or painted into
19:22a corner and it's like a collision
19:27watching some of these things that you
19:29were going through i'm just like oh no
19:30no please oh no no please oh [ __ ] oh
19:33don't please it's like sitting in a
19:34horror movie like no no don't open that
19:36door don't open that you know you're
19:38just thinking oh my god please um
19:43i mean those were the moments that made
19:44it so real that i thought were great but
19:47did you find moments where you think
19:49like oh [ __ ] this one's gonna this one's
19:53were there anything you were nervous
19:55about showing not just billy but the
19:58um where you thought like oh god
20:01like how uncomfortable it would be for
20:03you to be with them watching that thing
20:05that you put in their movie
20:07well yeah i mean look it's it's um uh
20:10they're our first audience so that's the
20:12other thing you know we probably
20:14screamed for friends and little pieces
20:19billy describes the friday night that
20:21she watched it with uh laura chelsea and
20:25then on sunday night we all gathered
20:28with the family and billy's closest team
20:30and watched it on imax
20:32a couple of days later and um
20:35you know look it was for me it was it's
20:37it's it's thrilling to share of course
20:40i'm nervous i'm nervous the way exactly
20:42the way you would imagine i'm nervous um
20:44but we've you know we've worked really
20:46hard on the film for
20:48for 10 12 months the editors and i
20:54you know we know the in we know how
20:58you know even at that point it was
21:00really it was it it was about two hours
21:02and 40 minutes so we still had 20
21:04minutes left to cut so we're excited to
21:06put it in front of an audience and see
21:08how they respond because once your
21:10audience is watching it you know where
21:12you're bored you know where things are
21:14too long you know we we left that
21:16screening and knew kind of exactly what
21:18we were going to do to get it to the
21:25i i don't want to say that there were
21:27things in there i was like oh my god i
21:28can't they everybody knew what they went
21:32and they knew and they knew footage that
21:34they had given us as well uh so um so
21:38you know we were excited we're excited
21:39to share it and we're very gratified i
21:41mean it was a very loving i want to say
21:44loving audience to share that movie with
21:47billy came in offering to uh to to to
21:50get cars for the editors so i knew we
21:52were and we were in good shape at that
21:54moment that was that was cause for
21:58okay speaking of cars now this to me
22:02not because of the car
22:05but because of what it represented in
22:06the film this i was as i was watching
22:11i was i was so delighted
22:13that you were setting up
22:16this thread or this line in the movie
22:23and you getting your driver's license
22:26represented some sort of freedom or
22:28liberation for you to fight i might be
22:30wrong this is what i got from him i'm
22:32like oh dude oh i see what he's doing i
22:35see what he's doing the car is freedom
22:38now i get it i get it i get it but the
22:40other thing that was so beautiful about
22:41that thread that went throughout the
22:43movie was that um it really did remind
22:50you're just [ __ ] can't get in your
22:52driver's license like you know you go
22:54back and forth from grammys to the blah
22:56blah blah blah the stadium and the blah
22:57blah blah and then it's like you're at
22:59the dmv like waiting to get your thing
23:02so i'm i mean all of that to say this
23:04was intentional correct am i correct
23:07well it happened it happened and that
23:09just you're describing [ __ ] good
23:12it's not just it's not just billy and
23:15it's not just the gift of the car and
23:17it's not just the driver's license
23:19that's just all those mythic things that
23:21these things stand for it's patrick and
23:24maggie and their and their their their
23:26daughter leaving the past it's freedom
23:29for her but it's it's you know and then
23:34you know delivers one of the great
23:38monolith cinema monologues of
23:40existential parental angst in the
23:43history of movies you know and then
23:45maggie comes out and is like where'd she
23:51perhaps one of i mean it beats usual
23:54suspects in like the best inning of a
23:56movie f it's just kind of like
23:59outfit of the sunset you're like yes
24:03it's so good okay another thing that i
24:05have to say because i mean i really
24:07really really did love this movie so
24:13having children of my own
24:15uh having a musician and family uh
24:18having been a musician like there's so
24:20many things where i'm just like i'm
24:22holding on to it like oh god i'm just
24:24like hanging on for this ride
24:25uh okay here's a question
24:30where you felt like [ __ ] and your body
24:37that those moments on stage
24:44good hour and a half in that day
24:57february march of 2019
25:00which for that specific period of time
25:02this was a europe tour that we did
25:05um before i really had like
25:08enough money to like get good
25:13like does that make it like i didn't
25:16to to be comfortable on tour yet but i
25:19was already too famous that i couldn't
25:21really do anything or go anywhere or
25:25and in that period of time literally
25:28from stepping foot on stage to
25:35only that amount of time
25:37was what brought joy to me and really it
25:40was that and that was it and it was it
25:43really it was it was weird and it was uh
25:47sad to think about but it was really
25:49true and it's exactly what you just
25:51asked and and yes is the answer and it
25:54it was you know i would have i would
25:56have these days that were just these
26:04and i just i i can't tell you the
26:11emptiness i felt in that period of time
26:14um and as soon as i would step on stage
26:16i was like home again and i i felt like
26:19home like literally like i was in my
26:23you really you really realize how
26:26doing shows is and seeing those faces in
26:30the crowd and having that connection and
26:32it's really like nothing else in the
26:35yeah it really makes things worth it i
26:39this question were you writing at the
26:42are you like a do you journal do you do
26:43that thing do you write all the time i
26:45was journaling a ton but i wasn't
26:47writing anything i was drawing i i used
26:49to just draw constantly especially in
26:52that period of time and it was all like
26:53terrifying drawings of
26:57um no i that's the other thing is that i
27:01you know writing for me at that time
27:04was really hard for me and i loved
27:08having done it but the act of doing it
27:11was really like made me feel really
27:13angry because i felt like i wasn't fast
27:14enough and i i didn't have good enough
27:18um and also when i was feeling
27:22shitty it was harder for me to feel
27:25motivated and it was really weird to be
27:31for doing something that at the time i
27:34really hated doing i loved every other
27:36aspect of it but the actual creation of
27:39it really like made me furious and
27:41what's great is over time i love it now
27:43i love creating and i think that it's
27:46it's so much fun and i've gotten so much
27:47better at it but at the time i was just
27:49you know i just turned 17
27:51and i was so i was in a i was in a
27:54really bad situation also and that
27:57honestly is the reason everything sucked
28:00uh yeah i was i was lots of things were
28:03bad and the shows were why it was good
28:07and we we did you know um you see that
28:10you do see that there's that one really
28:14moment in the car with maggie when billy
28:16looks out the window and says can i just
28:18can't we just pull over so i can walk
28:20around in the park and maggie says that
28:24but they both know it's not possible
28:26it's it's not an option anymore and you
28:29you feel that it's and and of course
28:32billy also was having
28:34awful shin splints and then
28:36you know a personal stitch i mean it was
28:40it was all piling up
28:44yeah i mean and then the shows and then
28:46the shows and then you see and there's
28:48that line early on that was so important
28:52you all have to be okay
28:56you're what makes me okay
28:58right and that connection it's it's it's
29:01it's the deepest connection you can
29:03imagine between audience and artists but
29:05also between artists and audience and
29:08you feel it both ways
29:09rj had you ever been on tour before
29:19how'd that go for you was that
29:21i mean it's fascinating and you feel
29:23that you see the challenges i had no
29:25idea it's a it's it's like a
29:26hermetically sealed experience through
29:29the through the world it's wild um
29:32we did get a winnebago which chased
29:35after the bus and i learned the hard way
29:38that you're not supposed to sleep in the
29:39winnebago while it's on the road um i
29:43spent uh i spent a certain amount of
29:45nights bouncing up and down on the bed
29:47yeah yeah i learned that um because we
29:49had to keep up with the bus going from
29:52city to city but um yeah it's it's it's
29:54intense the the you traveling
29:57troubadours what you do your journeys
30:00and your experiences and the way the the
30:02different tours kind of crisscross and
30:05those experiences and how important it
30:07is who else is on the road with you and
30:09how you're connecting with them and the
30:10friendships and you know uh
30:13we we and and you see in the film that
30:16that once billy kind of starts to get it
30:19right with the right combination of
30:20people and then all of a sudden it's
30:25you know it it can be the greatest thing
30:30this is i mean this is another
30:32thing this leads into family
30:33conversation but you know when
30:36so with our band we've had the same road
30:43some people up to 30 years working with
30:46they go back to nirvana days
30:50and i don't know what i would do without
30:52them i don't know if i could do that
30:54without them because
30:56when i walk out on stage
30:59i'm not just walking out there for
31:02and they're not just setting up my
31:04guitar doing my monitors because they're
31:08we're kind of all doing this for each
31:10other you know i we make sure that we
31:13stay on the road because we've got 30 35
31:17that rely on us just as we rely on them
31:21yes there is some sort of like comfort
31:24in wandering all over the world who
31:27[ __ ] knows what's gonna happen
31:32is not some it's like a love circus it's
31:34like it's like everybody like loves each
31:37other there's a lot of love there but um
31:40you know even beyond that
31:42to have your entire family with you
31:47everywhere you go um
31:51i can imagine that maybe it's a
31:53double-edged sword maybe it's not but it
31:56comes through in the movie it's pretty
32:01they're responsible for a lot of the
32:04love and care and support and concern in
32:09so billy like traveling around i mean
32:11anytime i've ever come to see you play
32:15you know your band's amazing i think you
32:17guys are great or whatever i like to
32:20i like to see what's up with your dad
32:23okay because i mean i i i feel like he's
32:26so chill but at the same time like i'm
32:29not [ __ ] with that dude you know what
32:32oh yeah his daughter's on stage it's
32:37more than any tour manager production
32:41like i just imagined him on the side of
32:42the stage like that's my [ __ ]
32:46yeah my dad is so it's true he's so
32:52i mean if you don't like know him
32:54meaning and you can't you really can't
32:55know my dad unless you live in the same
32:58house as him for years and years and
33:00years honest i'm dead serious you just
33:14like kind of not like he doesn't make a
33:16lot of facial expressions
33:18and then i le i love watching him at my
33:21shows also because my dad is very uh
33:23brutally honest person and if he doesn't
33:26like something he's not gonna pretend
33:30that he likes it and so that's that even
33:34more excited when he
33:37likes my music and he when he talks
33:39about my music and and really my dad
33:41loves what i create and it makes me feel
33:44so happy and the way that he compliments
33:47and talks to me about what he likes
33:51so genuine and pure because i know that
33:53he wouldn't he wouldn't say any of that
33:55that stuff if he didn't actually feel it
33:57and that's that's very
34:00uh satisfying to me it's really
34:03beautiful to see that in all of those
34:07trials and tribulations of what was
34:12um your father there to
34:15to protect you and that's that's really
34:19this you know this is this is he's
34:21this he's protecting her and then your
34:25um maggie's so awesome and here's one of
34:29um you and i are both lucky that we
34:32uh have super rad moms right and
34:37one of the things that i feel blessed
34:46my mom was sort of the same
34:48as yours and that she was a school
34:50teacher and she really like
34:52she she understood um
34:57the mind of a child and and how a kid
35:00becomes an individual um
35:04and i think that one of the things that
35:05she did was she kind of disciplined me
35:09like she would allow me to sort of like
35:12take those steps to find out who i was
35:16and i knew like okay i'm not gonna
35:18jeopardize this by being a [ __ ]
35:20dumbass like i'm i'm gonna do this right
35:25correct me if i'm wrong but i feel like
35:26your parents have given you this freedom
35:28that's allowed you to become
35:33yeah i uh i think about it all the time
35:36um i i just i don't i really don't know
35:43life would have become if if my parents
35:45didn't didn't give me uh uh
35:48an upper like a way of expressing
35:51what i wanted to do and like being able
36:00it's hard to explain but like
36:03you don't have to like
36:07well i don't talk about that but yeah no
36:09the the freedom that they gave us and
36:11this the also support that they gave us
36:20just the way that i was raised and
36:23um yeah and and also it wasn't like they
36:26were giving us freedom and they weren't
36:28you know they were neglecting us or
36:29anything our parents were so involved in
36:32our lives and like unbelievably involved
36:38didn't lie to my parents
36:40for my entire life until i was 16
36:44because i had a boyfriend i didn't want
36:45to tell them about that was it that was
36:46literally the only time and then as soon
36:47as that happened i felt bad and i
36:49haven't liked them since pretty much my
36:53i mean obviously you grow up and you're
36:55like oh maybe my parents don't need to
36:56know that because i don't want to hear
36:59literally for my whole life my parents
37:01are the people i tell everything to i
37:03tell my mom [ __ ] everything i
37:05couldn't help it when i was a kid i
37:07would get these panic attacks if i
37:08didn't tell my mom everything and it
37:10would make my friends so mad because
37:11they'd be like don't tell your mom and i
37:12would because what the hell is my mom my
37:16but but it's it is funny because there's
37:20you know if i talk about
37:22and this is a different subject i don't
37:24have to get into but sometimes i'll talk
37:25about you know bad things that i saw
37:27when i was younger online or you know
37:29things i was exposed to that i wish i
37:31wasn't and people are like wow her
37:32parents really weren't there that it's
37:34really to blame her parents and it's
37:35like i don't think people realize how
37:38stupid that is to say i don't think
37:44as as involved as a parent can be and as
37:47as much as they can try to control
37:50and help you and not and make sure you
37:52don't ever see anything bad you're gonna
37:54see it especially when you grow up with
37:56i just was on the internet constantly
38:00you know it wasn't like hey yeah
38:02here's a phone here's a car here's this
38:04that go drive and do anything and go do
38:06anything you want we don't care you have
38:08freedom it wasn't that kind of freedom
38:10it was freedom to express my emotions
38:16try things that i wanted to try and do
38:19things that i wanted to do
38:22it's just funny that that people are
38:24like oh well the reason that like wow
38:27she was in that bad situation her
38:29parents didn't help i was like you know
38:30how bad my parents tried to get me out
38:32of bad situations i wouldn't let them
38:34are you [ __ ] kidding me oh my god
38:36it's infuriating i see people say like
38:39wow i blame her parents for this and
38:41they really just they they should have
38:43gotten her out of that situation i'm
38:44like you know how stubborn a 17 year old
38:51nobody's changing a mind of a 17 year
38:53old i'm sorry they're just not i mean
38:56i came up with all sorts of ways to do
38:58things i wanted to do that i what that
39:00my parents didn't want me to do and
39:01that's just how [ __ ] annoying
39:02teenagers are i can't tell you how
39:06i i always always think back to how my
39:12uh treated me and how they supported me
39:18there was no punishment
39:21and there was no reward so it didn't it
39:23didn't make me feel scared to tell them
39:25things and it didn't also make me only
39:27do things to get a reward it made me
39:34love you know and i i always thank my
39:37parents for that and my parents really
39:39did a better job than i ever could at
39:45yeah it's amazing i mean one of the
39:50initial or immediate
39:52uh reactions or responses to watching
39:54the movie i basically texted all of my
40:01i mean i know it's like rock and roll
40:03movie or whatever i was like you guys
40:04need to [ __ ] watch this movie you
40:06guys need to see how this works like you
40:08guys everybody needs to see this yeah
40:10yeah um because it was really inspiring
40:16i don't want to take up your entire day
40:17i could like i said i'm a [ __ ]
40:19blabbermouth dude i could do this for
40:26after making that documentary
40:31what do you what do you do
40:34i mean like what do you
40:36is it is it something of a time capsule
40:40is it something that you just like tuck
40:43is it something like you revisit for a
40:46is it something that you never [ __ ]
40:49want to watch ever again
40:51do you watch it every once in a while
40:53because you need to cry like i don't
40:54know like after you've done the
40:55documentary because here's one of the
40:57things that i think is really beautiful
40:59about music and documentary together
41:03when you hear music it's just basically
41:05it can be just a sound it could be very
41:07one-dimensional it could just be a sound
41:11when then you go the next level deeper
41:16maybe who they are why they wrote the
41:18song what was going on in their life
41:20when they wrote the song well then the
41:21song takes on this whole new meaning
41:25people who watch your movie who may have
41:27never heard your music before will now
41:29understand your music in a different way
41:32had they not uh now that they've seen
41:38so after you've done this like i'm sure
41:41that people who had never heard you
41:42before which is [ __ ] nobody but for
41:45you know people that had never heard
41:51in like maybe a different light but
41:52after you do this now the world knows
41:54[ __ ] everything about you
41:58where do you go from there musically and
42:00as a filmmaker rj like then what then i
42:03mean what a [ __ ] gigantic success
42:06like i don't know where you guys go from
42:12i'll i'll i'll start billy i i i
42:15it's a different of course it's a
42:16different experience for for the
42:17filmmaker and for the for for billy um
42:22and and we're so gratified with the
42:24response and and and that's that's an
42:26amazing exciting thing the film kind of
42:29becomes a time capsule you're right
42:35i've i've made it a number of these
42:38films so i've had this experience and
42:40it's incredibly rich because
42:43we'll look at this we make the film to
42:45some degree from the perspective of 10
42:4820 years down the road we think about
42:51that i think that we will look back at
42:54it i think we will have a point of view
42:56i think the film itself will become a
42:59between when we filmed it
43:02and when you look at it down the road
43:04whatever happens whatever happens with
43:06billy's life with her work with her
43:08experience there's always going to be a
43:13i was very touched uh recently you know
43:16we didn't get to film this because of
43:18covid not filming this we didn't get to
43:19screen this movie yet at different uh
43:22film festivals and things like that like
43:24you normally do but recently we had a
43:26screening and billy and maggie and
43:28patrick and i did a panel and it was
43:30great and afterwards maggie said to me
43:33you know i'm i'm i'm already so
43:35gratified that the film exists because
43:38it's about a life a time in our life
43:41that doesn't exist anymore and it's only
43:44and that time and because everything's
43:46changed so much has changed the same
43:50the same home but so much has changed
43:52and that's what uh that's part of the
43:55richness of these uh of these films
43:57especially these cinema verite films you
43:59know if you go back and look at the war
44:01room now it's like it's a different
44:03world it's a different land it's a
44:05different america if you look at this
44:07film i think in time you'll see
44:12as i say you'll see a a dialogue between
44:15that moment and this moment so um
44:19that's part of what's gratifying to me
44:25what about you billy yeah what about you
44:34i do what i don't but
44:37i kind of wish that every moment of my
44:39life was filmed and made into a
44:41documentary every three years because
44:45i have always loved home movies so much
44:47and since i was a kid since i even knew
44:49what home movies were
44:51uh and this is why my my parents filmed
44:53my entire childhood because they wanted
44:57and we put it all on uh dvds and we have
45:02thick folder of dvds filled with my
45:06used to watch it like a show like when i
45:08was a kid um and it had only been a few
45:10years you know and i just was like i
45:12loved watching it and i i loved seeing
45:14how different my life was and how
45:17different i was and different things
45:18that happened and i'm i'm i'm the most
45:20sentimental person you'll ever meet and
45:23i just love it so much and
45:25you know even though my mom filmed
45:29in the beginning of my career it's not
45:31honestly it's like sad that things don't
45:33go on dvds anymore because you can't
45:35really like put them in the tv and watch
45:36them like a movie it's like on your
45:38phone and it's not as
45:40important i feel but
45:42having my life actually filmed and then
45:45sitting down to watch it in a way that i
45:47didn't edit myself and like seeing it
45:53perspective was so amazing and beautiful
45:56and i loved it so much that
45:58i and you you forget your life you know
46:01you really just forget [ __ ] that happens
46:03in your life and it's so weird and sad
46:08i just watched this movie called come on
46:10which is walking phoenix's movie and i
46:13there's a scene where he's talking to
46:17just just this like perfect kid in this
46:19in this movie like such a perfect
46:26you know you're gonna forget this
46:28you're just gonna forget this like like
46:30every kid does and the kid is like no
46:31i'm not and he's like well you might but
46:34he probably will forget this and most
46:36people forget everything that happens in
46:38their lives and it's really sad and
46:39there's this whole scene about it and
46:40you should watch it it's an amazing
46:43that's that's the thing with life is we
46:44just forget stuff that happens and then
46:47you know if it's filmed we're like oh my
46:49god i forgot about that and now
46:51shark's trying to get in here sorry uh i
46:53forgot that that happened and it was so
46:55amazing and i really wish
46:58that without having to
47:02without having to do all the work i
47:04would like my whole life to be filmed
47:07and made into a documentary every three
47:08years because i want i want to have it
47:10on footage i want to have
47:12i want to be able to watch my life
47:17hey sure well this is the thing i mean
47:20i'm glad you brought it back around to
47:22movies from when you were young because
47:24i think it's the perfect way to wrap
47:28this movie is so intimate and it's so
47:31real that i think it really
47:37fit somewhere in those stacks of dvds
47:41that you guys have in your closet um it
47:43really it really does seem like
47:46one of those rj i'm sure you remember
47:49you know you would flip through your
47:50parents photo albums and there's like
47:53110 kodak camera pictures that are now
47:56like faded and the kodachrome colors and
47:58that becomes the basis of your memory
48:00for the rest of your life just as you
48:02said billy but um thank you guys
48:05for talking that was so rad the movie's
48:08so good you're both so badass
48:13i can't wait to see the sequel
48:15ah we love you dave thanks for doing
48:17this all right guys really appreciate it
48:19billy so great to see you
